What Is a Girl Worth?: My Story of Breaking the Silence and Exposing the Truth about Larry Nassar and USA Gymnastics

Author: Rachael Denhollander

Pages: 323

Rating: Due to the subject matter and the sometimes graphic descriptions, I wouldn't allow anyone below probably 15 or 16 to read this.

Summary:
Rachael Denhollander’s voice was heard around the world when she spoke out to end the most shocking US gymnastics scandal in history. The first victim to publicly accuse Larry Nassar, the former USA Gymnastics team doctor who sexually abused hundreds of young athletes, Rachael now reveals her full story for the first time. How did Nassar get away with it for so long? How did Rachael and the other survivors finally stop him and bring him to justice? And how can we protect the vulnerable in our own families, churches, and communities?

What Is a Girl Worth? is the inspiring true story of Rachael’s journey from an idealistic young gymnast to a strong and determined woman who found the courage to raise her voice against evil, even when she thought the world might not listen. This deeply personal and compelling narrative shines a spotlight on the physical and emotional impact of abuse, why so many survivors are reluctant to speak out, what it means to be believed, the extraordinary power of faith and forgiveness, and how we can learn to do what’s right in the moments that matter most.

My Thoughts: I haven't written a post on this page in a while, but this one is worth it. I've learned so much over the last few years about how if you want to understand someone, you need to listen to their personal story. And this book does just that. Denhollander walks all of us through the questions many people ask when accounts of sexual abuse are brought forth. Why didn't the victim report earlier? Could they have misunderstood? But the alleged abuser is so NICE! This book was seriously incredible. At the beginning the author tells us that her parents were very involved, very open about sexuality, they taught their children about safety, but that still didn't protect her. We have to be so, so, careful, and even then, it might not be enough.

One of the points she brings up that I loved the most is how people were so unwilling to believe that this man was capable of such depravity, because of how "kind" he was and how many good things he had done. He was involved with charity work, volunteered so many hours to "treat" girls at his own home. He was so personable. But, Denhollander points out that it doesn't matter how much good he did. That DOESN'T cancel out the bad! You can't just erase your crimes by doing lots of other good stuff. It doesn't work that way.

I learned so much reading this book, especially about how difficult it is for victims to be believed, gain justice, or stop their abuser. Society just brushes these things off way too easily and it's not ok. My favorite quote from the book is this, "Why don't victims report? Because most of the time, the only thing reporting accomplishes is heightening the trauma to almost unbearable levels. It invites an audience to view your sexual assault. It's choosing to have no voice in the process after having it stolen from you. That's why victims don't report."  (pg 271).

This book was good. If you have ever thought, "Abuse will never happen to me/my children/the people I love because we are careful/teach them about their bodies/don't go to bad places/we're vigilant" then you need to read this book. If you're in any sort of position where you have the opportunity to listen to children or anyone who may possibly report to you about abuse, you need to read this book. The consequences of failing to take abuse allegations seriously are astronomical. By the time Larry Nasser was brought to justice, numerous girls over several decades had attempted to report him, only to be either completely ignored or find that the investigation was not taken seriously enough. I'm hoping and praying that our culture and practices will keep heading in a positive direction of change, but we all have to keep speaking up.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

Author: Donald Miller

 
Summary:

After writing a successful memoir, Donald Miller's life stalled. During what should have been the height of his success, he found himself unwilling to get out of bed, avoiding responsibility, even questioning the meaning of life. But when two movie producers proposed turning his memoir into a movie, he found himself launched into a new story filled with risk, possibility, beauty, and meaning.
A Million Miles in a Thousand Years chronicles Miller's rare opportunity to edit his life into a great story, to reinvent himself so nobody shrugs their shoulders when the credits roll. Through heart-wrenching honesty and hilarious self-inspection, Donald Miller takes readers through the life that emerges when it turns from boring reality into meaningful narrative.
Miller goes from sleeping all day to riding his bike across America, from living in romantic daydreams to fearful encounters with love, from wasting his money to founding a nonprofit with a passionate cause. Guided by a host of outlandish but very real characters, Miller shows us how to get a second chance at life the first time around. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years is a rare celebration of the beauty of life.

My Thoughts: I feel like that summary doesn't do a good job describing this book. It was AMAZING. I wasn't sure exactly what I was getting into but I finally decided to check it out after one of my favorite podcasters repeatedly recommended it and then did an entire podcast episode based on it. This book was worth all the hype she gave it. Seriously. If I had been reading a personal copy instead of a library one I would have been highlighting stuff all over the place. It was that good. The author starts with talking about how a couple of filmmakers want to make a movie out of a memoir he wrote. They have to write this screenplay and have to change a few things in order to make it a good story that people will enjoy watching. So Don kind of goes on this journey finding out what makes a good story, and then figuring out how to make his actual life into one. And here's the thing - we all can do it.

I think one of my biggest takeaways is that challenges and difficulties in our lives are some of the elements of good story. We won't have a good story to tell our children, grandchildren, or even God someday if nothing really ever happens to us. And we don't have to wait for things to happen. We can go make them happen. We can create amazing stories in our lives, if we want to.

This quote is one of my favorites. "Somehow we realize that great stories are told in conflict, but we are unwilling to embrace the potential greatness of the story we are actually in. We think God is unjust, rather than a master storyteller."

Whoa. That got me thinking so hard. We sometimes get so mad at God for putting us through this or that or the other thing, but...he's just helping us create an amazing story that we can be proud of one day.

Here's another good quote. "If the point of life is the same as the point of a story, the point of life is character transformation. If I got any comfort as I set out on my first story, it was that in nearly every story, the protagonist is transformed. He's a jerk at the beginning and nice at the end, or a coward at the beginning and brave at the end. If the character doesn't change, the story hasn't happened yet. And if story is derived from real life, if story is just condensed version of life then life itself may be designed to change us so that we evolve from one kind of person to another."

If I haven't convinced you to read this book yet, just google the title and "quotes" and keep reading. So many little gems, so much to think about, seriously....SO GOOD. Go read it.